[BIG GAY AL]
Bombs are flying
People are dying
Children are crying
Politicians are lying too
Cancer is killing
Texaco's spilling
The whole world's gone to hell
But how are you?

I'm super, thanks for asking
All things considered, I couldn't be better, I must say
I'm feeling super, no, nothing bugs me
Everything is super when you're—
Don't you think I look cute in this hat?

I'm so sorry, Mr. Cripple
But I just can't feel too bad for you right now
Because I'm feeling so insanely super
That even the fact that you can't walk can't bring me down

[DANCERS]
He's super, thanks for asking
All things considered, he couldn't be better, he must say

[AL]
I'm super, no, nothing bugs me
Everything is super when you're—
Don't you think I look cute in this hat, these little pants
This matching tie that I got at Vogue?
I'm super!
[DANCERS]
In the barracks and the trenches as well

[AL, spoken]
Stick 'em up!

[DANCERS]
Big Gay Al says do ask, do tell

[AL, spoken]
Skittles!

[DANCERS]
Yes, he's super and he's proud to convey

[AL, spoken]
Okay!

[DANCERS]
Everything is super when you're

[AL & DANCERS]
Gay
When you're gay!