[Skit]
News Reporter: This is Michael S. [Modey ?] reporting live for Channel 67 news. In many different cities across the country tonight, politicians have been found burned alive in their homes. We're still not sure of all the details of these incidents, but it seems the main thing tying these victims together is that all of these politicians' careers have been riddled with scandals, accusations of corruption and they've also been accused of either being a part of, or having ties, with white supremacists organizations
Now all the eyewitnesses across the country who saw the fires have reported seeing the same suspect at the crime scenes. They've described the suspect as over 6 feet in height, an athletic build, and wearing black work clothes. Now this next detail of the suspect is probably the strangest thing I've ever reported in my entire career. Eyewitnesses say the suspect looked like the Devil, red skin with two horns coming out of its forehead. There have been several people found burned alive in Flint, Michigan as well. All of these people are believed to have had some sort of responsibility in allowing the Flint Water Crisis to occur. And it looks like Eyewitnesses in Flint have reported seeing the same devilish figure at the crime scenes
It seems people on the internet are debating whether or not this was an act of terrorism or patriotism, and they've all started referring to this mysterious figure as the Devil in Dickies. This hashtag is actually trending on social media right now. Channel 67 will keep you posted with more details as they come in. There are many questions on the minds of Americans tonight. Is this the work of a terrorist organization? Is this an act of patriotism? And who, or should I say what, is this Devil in Dickies?