(Lord It’s Hard to Be Happy When You’re Not) Using the Metric System

Music and lyrics by Adam Goren



(Yardsticks are pathetic)



12 inches per foot

2 pints per quart

Why don’t we make it easy?

The English system of measurement must be laid to history

We can use units of 10 and convert with ease

Just like all the other countries

I am in command yes I am taking a stand

From this disease we must be free! (Good God!)



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You are drunk with your tradition that has no validity

While I’m intoxicated with smarts and metrics

Come drink a deciliter with me

We want metrics, we want them now! We know we can win!

I weigh 170 pounds, that’s 90 kilograms

See metrics can even make you thin



(Yardsticks are pathetic)



All cool things are in metrics

For example, here’s just one

I got my “nine”, well that’s 9 millimeters

Sounds cooler then my .3 something inches gun!

The powerful, if non-existent “they”

Will call me communist or call me scum

But it’s worth it: Canadians will think we’re smart

At least they’ll think we are not as dumb



CHORUS



The revolution’s here

We must overcome at last

As we symbolically stick their 12 inch foot up their antiquated ass… guitar!



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