[DEWEY, spoken]
It begins on a dark stage
And then a beam of light
And you see me... and my guitar

[Dewey makes guitar noises with his mouth]

(sung)
In the end of time
There was a man who knew the road
And the writing was written on the stone

(spoken)
And then a thin layer of fog comes around my ankles
Roadies, this is dry ice, we're gonna talk about this later

(sung)
In the ancient time
An artist lead the way
But no one could seem to understand

(spoken)
Chimes, Freddy!

(sung)
In his heart he knew
That the artist must be true
But the legend of the rent was way past due
(spoken)
And then Katie comes in on the bass!

[Dewey makes bass noises with his mouth]

(sung)
You think you'll be just fine
Without me, but you're mine
You think you can just kick me out of the band?

(spoken)
And then Zack comes in with a face melter!

[More a capella guitar noises]

(sung)
Well, there's just one problem there
The band is mine!
How can you kick me out of what is mine?

(spoken)
And then Freddy comes in with a Hawaii-Five-O drum solo!

[A capella drum noises]

(sung)
Well, you're not hardcore
Unless you live hardcore!
(spoken)
And I need the backup singers to be like:

(sung)
"Well, you're not hardco- No, you're not hardcore!"
"Unless you live hardco- Unless you live hardcore!"
But the legend of the rent was way hardcore!

(spoken)
Bam! Bam! Confetti explosion!
And then that's- uh- that's all I have right now, it's a work in progress