[EVELYN]
If we get married
We’d have such a wedding

[PATRICK]
You will be carried
To your beheading

[EVENLYN]
It’s so romantic
We’ll be in Page Six

[PATRICK]
Me in that rag
Next to some trashy bitch

[EVELYN]
I’d like a huge diamond
Won’t settle for less

[PATRICK]
How many karats
Or should I just guess?

If you only knew
[JEAN]
If I only knew

[EVELYN]
If we get married

[JEAN]
Would he be happy?

[PATRICK]
If you only knew

[EVELYN]
The band should be ethnic
Perhaps a bit reggae

[PATRICK]
Maybe machine guns
Will make a good segue

[JEAN]
If he got married
He might relax

[EVELYN]
I’d serve him dinner
[PATRICK]
I’d swing an axe

[JEAN]
It’s that look in his eye
That I don’t understand[EVELYN]
I’ll burst into tears
When he takes my hand 
 
[JEAN]
When he holds my hand 
 
 
[PATRICK]
When I cut off her hand
If you only knew[JEAN]
If I only knew

[EVELYN]
If we get married

[JEAN]
Would I be happy?

[PATRICK]
If you only knew
[JEAN]
If I only knew

[EVELYN]
If we get married

[PATRICK]
If you only knew