I'm gonna wrap myself in paper
I'm gonna daub myself with glue
Stick some stamps on the top of my head
I'm gonna mail myself to you

I'm gonna tie me in a little red string
I'm gonna tie blue ribbons too
Climb up into my mailbox
I'm gonna mail myself to you

When you find me in your mailbox
Cut the string and let me out
Wash the glue off of my fingers
Stick some bubble gum in my mouth

Take me out of my wrapping paper
Wash the stamps off of my head
Pour me full of some ice cream soda
Tuck me into a nice warm bed