I went to school this morning
It was the first day of the year
Took out my paper and my pencil
And I opened up my mind and my ears
The teacher said, "Now students take your places
"Everybody settle in your desk
"The first class in going to be science
"Gonna use the Bible as our text."

Chorus
There ain't no monkeys in you
There're none in me, I know
And there ain't no monkeys in Kansas
'Cause the school board to me so

So let's get rid of Pythagoras
Relativity and all the rest
Cause if you can't find it in Genesis
It ain't gonna be in our test

Chorus

Now, the land is flat in Kansas
As anyone can see
And if the school board says that the world is flat
Well, that's good enough for me
Chorus

Every culture has a way to see creation
Each religion has a version of its own
So if you aren't Christian or Jewish
You better hope Kansas ain't your home

Chorus

I've learned that faith is one thing
And knowledge is something else
One doesn't rule the other one out
As Einstein said himself

Chorus

Now, God gave us intelligence
And God he gave us brains
But I guess he ran just a little bit short
On that school board on the plains

Chorus