Let me tell you about a girl I know
She had a drink about an hour ago
Sitting in a corner by herself
In a bar in downtown Hell
She heard a noise and she looked through the door
And saw a man she'd never seen before
Light skin, light blue eyes, a double chin and a plastic smile
Her eyebrow raised as he walked through the door
And took an empty seat next to her at the bar
"My brand new car is parked right outside
How'd ya like to go for a ride?"
She said, "Wait a minute, I have to think"
He said, "That's fine. May I please buy you a drink"
One drink turned into three and four, and they left and got into his car
And they drove away someplace real far

Now, baby, the time has come
How'd ya like to have a little fun?
And she said, "If we could please be on our way, I will not run"

That's when things got out of control
She didn't want to
He had his way
She said, "Let's go"
He said, "No way"
Baby, baby, it's your lucky day
Shut your mouth, we're gonna do it my way
Come on, baby, don't be afraid
If it wasn't for date rape, I'd never get laid
He finished up, he started the car
He turned around, drove back to the bar
He said, "Now, baby, don't be sad
In my opinion, you weren't half-bad"
She picked up a rock, threw it at the car
Hit him in the head, now he's got a big scar
Come on, party people, won't you listen to me
Date rape stylie

The next day, she went through her drawer
And looked up her local attorney-at-law
Went to the phone and filed a police report
And then she took the guy's ass to court
The day he stood in front of the judge
He screamed, "She lies, that little slut"
The judge knew he was full of shit
And he gave him twenty-five years
Now his heart is filled with tears

One night in jail, it was getting late
And he was butt-raped by a large inmate
And he screamed
But the guards paid no attention to his cries

That's when things got out of control
The moral of the date rape story is
It doesn't pay to be drunk and horny
But that's the way it had to be
They locked him up and threw away the key
Well, I can't take pity on a man of his kind
Even though he now takes it in the behind
But that's the way it had to be
They locked him up and threw away the key
Well, I can't take pity on a man of his kind
Even though he now takes it in the behind

La la la la la
La la la la la
La la la la la
La la la la la

She didn't want to
She didn't want to
She didn't want to
She didn't want to take it