“Weird Al” Yankovic
Why Does This Always Happen to Me?
[Verse 1]
I was watching my TV one night
When they broke in with a special report
About some devastating earthquake in Peru
There were 30,000 crushed to death
Even more were buried alive
On the Richter scale it measured 8.2
And I said "God, please answer me one question
Why'd they have to interrupt The Simpsons just for this?"
What a drag, cause I was taping it and everything
Now I have to wait for the rerun
To see the part of the show I missed

[Chorus]
Why does this always happen?
Why does this always happen to me?
Why does this always happen?
Why does this always happen to me?
Ba-ba-ba-ba (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
Ba-ba-ba-ba (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)

[Verse 2]
I was driving down the highway
When all the traffic slowed to a crawl
There was a twelve-car pile-up: Everybody dead
And I saw brains and guts and vital organs splattered everywhere
As well as my friend Robert's disembodied head
And I thought "Oh, Rob. I just had lunch with him
Hey, wait a minute, he still owes me money, what a j*rk!"
Well there's five bucks that I'm never gonna see again
Plus, on top of everything else
It looks like I'm gonna be late to work
[Chorus]
Why does this always happen?
Why does this always happen to me?
Why does this always happen?
Why does this always happen to me?
Ba-ba-ba-ba (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
Ba-ba-ba-ba (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)

[Piano Solo]

[Verse 3]
Oh the other day my boss said we were running low on toner
And he told me I should buy another case
Well I told him I was busy
But he still just kept on asking
So I turned around and stabbed him in the face
Oh and wouldn't you know it, my knife got stuck
I guess that's probably bound to happen now and then
But I'm afraid I may have bent the tip a little
And I know that blade will never ever be quite as sharp again

[Chorus]
Why does this always happen?
Why does this always happen to me?
Why does this always happen?
Why does this always happen to me?
Ba-ba-ba-ba (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)
Ba-ba-ba-ba (Ba-ba-ba-ba-ba)