You know one time I knew a guy called Ralph
Seems like a really long time ago now, but
He was a friend

Well there's guys like Hoyst
That gotta be moist
Girls like Joanna
With a modern day manner
Mamas like Joyce
With her turned up voice
The eyes-apple handles
That taste of a triple banana
Oh, Ralph, give me a spanner
That's what I want

Well, there's guys like Raymond
That gotta be dim
Cats like John
That gotta be dumb
Unlike him
You come in
With a guise that can handle the pace of a young iguana
Please, Ralph, give me a spanner
Come on, Ralph, that's what I want