Dad's got something up his sleeve
Melting Arthur been conceived
I love winter spring and fall
You I love the best of all

Daddy's just a bogus man
Let us get him while we can
In the coal shed when he's high

One and one and one is three
That's too much for you and me
Arthur is a good boy now
Milks his Mom and milks the cow

On a grey mid-winter's morn
Melting Arthur he was born
He grew up extremely nice
Melting hearts as hard as ice, 'cause

He loves winter, spring and fall
He loves Mother best of all

But the sad thing is to say
Nasty Dad gets in the way
His demons become too much
She recoils at his touch
Sleeps out in the rabbit hutch
With Arthur
Nasty Dad
Nasty Dad
Nasty Dad
Nasty ...

Dad gets jealous, what a drag
Finds them in a sleeping bag
Though he's only four it's daft

But Dad constructs a special bomb
To blow them all to kingdom come
But melting Arthur gets there first
Melts down Dad and buys a hearse