brentalfloss
How the Trump Stole Christmas!
You're a douchebag, Mr. Trump
I would smack you if I could
You said "Mexicans are rapists, but perhaps a few are good"
Mr. Trump!
If nothing you've said so far has killed your campaign
Then God knows what would
You made fun of a disabled guy, and then acted unaware
You took time out of a speech to make a stranger pull your hair
You'll say absolutely anything that keeps you in the news
Like you "don't like black accountants" 'cause you'd "rather stick to Jews"
You gave Lindsey Graham's number out on national TV
And your hair's like cotton candy made of butterscotch and pee
Mr. Trump!
The symbol of our nation tried to kill you
That's pretty clear to me
You're sort of lumpy, Mr. Trumpy
You're a prick, a dick, a putz
You retweeted fake statistics from a Neo Nazi nut
Mr. Trump!
All your other facts and figures
Come directly from your butt
You get little bits of spittle in the corner of your mouth
And you get support from racists, cretins, bigots, and The South
You'd send ISIS-fleeing refugees right back into the slaughter
Once you said you'd date Ivanka if she weren't, in fact, your daughter
You made up that 9/11 thing, the one you won't retract
How were you the only witness to the "thousands" in the act?
You keep standing by each random lie you pull out of your ass
Like BS-ing through a book report, then threatening the class
So you'll ban a whole religion? Not a one will you admit?
I'd compare your tone to Hitler, but then he knew when to quit
When you frown it's like a toddler trying hard take a dump
You've set progress back a hundred years just getting on the stump
Yet with every vile thing you say, your numbers get a bump
Mr. Trump!
You're a schmuck!