[Hook]
LOL, OMG
A girl she came up to me
She told to give her a ring
But I prefer sexting

[YTCracker]
Tipping on rows ain't mo
In the VIP
I'm wearing jeans and a tee
And I'm feeling kind of down so I got to get a big round ask around for company
Problem is: I'm too drunk to get up and try to talk to women
Earlier hit the Patron Silver now it's got the whole club spinning

I whip out the iPhone
Go to favorites and pick a favorite name
Then I hit "Send Message" begin typing all my silly game
Thank god for auto-correct without it you'd get gibberish
I'm typing nasty shit then a bag of black licorice

I talk about your private parts my private parts are touching
I get descriptive for the bitches that's how they get loving
My command of the English language I can tell a story well
And I get you gushing out your vag' like an oil well

I can rang your bell from the seat of the rear of the club
So that later when I come by I can end my career
Braid my bone against your hip bone
Leaving you screaming like Kevin McAllister in Home Alone
For boss all service come
[Hook] (x2)

[Hairetsu]
I ain't gonna lie the shit I tried the shit I do and the shit I've done
I met some girl the over night and she was tight and we had fun
And when it was over I bounced like a soldier then we went our ways
And then the next day she hit me up at three to say

"I'm so horny can you bone me love you long time"
I told her that I love the sex but you got me at the wrong time
I'm straight loaded in another city can't get with me girl
But the way that I work my words in iMessage will rock your world

I say I need vagina and she say you is mine
I say some shit that is straight up borderline a sex crime
Choking your neck line setting up the next line
Leaving you sitting in suspense while waiting on the text chime

I got you off and now your finger's full of wet slime
I tell you ttyl, adios, until the next time
Listen to this vet rhyme
I respect mine

I'm a playa I'm a playa
Tech N9ne
[Hook] (x2)