[Verse 1]
High school party, senior year
Boys and girls are all sippin' on beer
I like soda, where's the soda?
Am I the only fucking person here that likes soda?
I see you from across the crowd
I said the party is bumpin' and the music is loud
You're really drunk and you're lookin' sad
It's like a date rape ad
Girl, then we start to dance and
Girl, baby this is romance
Girl, I'm startin' to grow down below
Shit, why did I wear sweatpants?
Girl, your body's like what
Conjunction junction that's a fine ass, but
I'm like a cashew in a lollipop
Just keep suckin' 'til you get to the nut
And I said let's rob an Asian kitchen
Or stroll down the block
Either way girl, we're takin' a wok (walk) ...Nothing?
You're gonna love me the way my uncle did
Except you're not gonna go to court for doin' it
Be a guillotine or my girl instead
Either way, you're givin' me head
I'm gonna love you, baby the right way
Shawty with a body lookin' hotty when I say girl
When I say girl
We go into the bedroom exchanging nervous laughter
Why's it called dry humping if I always need a towel after?
You spread your naked legs and I see that wound that never healed
Even though you're yellin' for me, I can tell your lips are sealed
We're both aware of my erection, you ask if I have protection
I say
"Well no, I tried to buy 'em once, I was in the convenience store, my old babysitter walked in and I had to hide them near the Tic-Tac's, I was so embarrassed, I peed myself a little bit"
[Break]
Girl, ooh girl

[Verse 2]
Insert a euphemism
A sexy mental prism
Increase my pelvic rhythm
Fill you with my syllogism
I know your body and I know how to please you
Don't thank me, thank Wikipedia
Guys don't go down, well I am-
What the fuck is that?
I should have brought my diagram
Ooh, did you feel that?
That was an educated guess
Ooh, did you feel that?
Uh, that one was a sneeze, my bad
High school party, senior year
None of that happened cause I wasn't invited