[Spoken]
I went through a pretty rough breakup recently. It was a long time coming, we had a lot of conversations about it, she and I. But recently, we've had the conversation. It wasn't recent, but I can remember it like it was yesterday. She came out of the shower, hair wet, everything was wet. If you haven't seen a shower: It's a thing with water, and it covers you, and she had just been in that. She came right out of it and she looked me in the eyes and she said:

[Girl]
It's over
We shouldn't fight to stay together just to fight again
It's over
We're unhappy
We need to take a break from us to make us right again
And even though it's not gonna go any further
I swear I don't regret a second of it
And when the dust has settled
I hope we can still be friends

[Bo]
And then I said
EAT A DICK!
EAT A DICK!
EAT A FUCKING DICK, BITCH!
PUT ON YOUR DICK EATING GLOVES
GET READY TO GOBBLE A DICK UP!
IF YOU DON'T LIKE THIS DICK SITCH
EAT A DICK, BITCH!

[Girl]
(Starting to think I made the right decision here)
Look, you're angry
I can see that
But you don't need to make this harder than it has to be
I try to speak to you
But you won't listen-
[Bo]
EAT A DICK!

[Girl]
Hold on, please just let me-

[Bo]
EAT A DICK!

[Girl]
Oh my God
Honestly, are you fucking five?
I try to talk this out, and you refuse to even listen to me
I'm saying how I'm feeling
And you're saying "eat a dick"
Does that seem like a mature response to you?

[Bo]
NO!
BUT SEE I THINK THE ISSUE IS
I'VE GOT MY FATHERS TEMPER
AND I'M EMOTIONALLY INARTICULATE!
SO RATHER THAN BEING HONEST AND VULNERABLE
I'VE BEEN A QUICK SWITCH
BECAUSE I'M HURTING INSIDE
AND I'M TRYING TO HIDE IT, SO
EAT A DICK, BITCH!
I thought we had a future together, you fucking whore
[Girl]
I didn't think you'd cry for me
I didn't think you cared
I thought you were lashing out in anger
Now I see you're scared
I'm scared, too
Maybe we can work this out
And not break up

[Bo]
Really?

[Girl]
NO, LICK MY CLIT!
LICK MY MOTHERFUCKING CLIT!
YOU THINK THREE LOUSY TEARS
OFFSETS THREE YEARS OF SHIT
I DESERVE BETTER THAN YOU
GET ME WETTER, THEN SCREW
SORRY, YOU'RE NOT WHAT I NEED, HUN
LICK THIS CLIT AND LEAVE, SON

[Spoken Outro]
Hey, if you guys are having a good time, make some silence!
Cool