Man on the Internet
Rouxls Kaard
[Part I]
[Intro]
So the worms hath cometh out to play...
Gah ha ha! Thoust fools!
Beholdeth, Rouxls Kaard, thou're greatest adversary!
[Verse 1]
Thou crawleth from the dirt
You fillest me with mirthe
While mine puzzles shall fillst thee with fear!
You struggle and toil
You're filled with turmoil
Bamboozledeth for one hundred years!
Now thou seest
The power of meest
Your mind will SNAP as you quit-
*Chimes*
[Interlude]
GOD. DAMN IT
SURPRISETH! Welcome back, worms! Thou hast no hopeth now against mine even greater puzzle! Beholdeth!
[Verse 2]
Toile and pain
Beholdeth mine domaineth
As I slowly breaketh thine mind
Thou arteth fools
To challenge-e the rules
A greatere foe thou'll never find-
*Chimes*
[Segue: Rouxls Kaard & Ralsei]
Ah... Ah.. Ha...! Ha ha ha!
That wasn'tst really mine ultimate puzzle!
I haveth a wayst better one right... here!
Can... can we see it?
No
[Part II]
[Verse 3]
Sometimes it gets real hard
No one around here appreciates the Kaard
Mayhaps thou shalt stop
Take a little-e dip into mine hip shop
[Verse 4]
The duke of puzzles, that's me
Servingeth the king obediently
Mine hobbies includeth long walks in the dungeon
And calligraphyest too, for fungeon
[Verse 5]
Shut up! Of course that rhymed!
I should locketh thou up for the crime
But I probably won't, let's be honest here
'Tis not exactly a cushy career
[Verse 6]
I'm the newest addition, the Kaard's a replacement
The dukes before me are now in yon basement
Ooh, look at you, on pinseth and needles
Have I your attention, little water beetle?
[Verse 7]
I love the lords and ladybugs
Arms spread wide leaning down for hugs
For all who appreciate the sesquipedalian
Who runneth rings arounde lightner aliens
[Verse 8]
Shut up! I'm still good at rhyming!
For I am a master of dramatic timing!
In glory and wit there is no equal!
I hope I get more lines in the sequel
[Verse 9]
Thou're victory is just a fluke
Everyone knows to bet on duke
I'm nationwidesteth, I'm bad
I'm at leasteth a number two dad
[Verse 10]
Get thee gone, I'm going on the scene
The epitome of thine hopes and dreams
Stilleth the duke of rhyming! My record's not marred
Lyrical victory with only 32 bars
[Outro]
A neweth record
Perfection incarnate, much liketh mine own self
What, art thou still listening, worms?
Have I that greateth an attraction?
I supposeth I should not beeth surprised
Yon fanbase hath some interesting ideas